Pasumbag ka?

In the couple of days I spent with my lolo, who, by the way has slowly slipped into the grips of senility, I have relearned the meanings of several Visayan phrases.

1. "Kinsa man ni?"
Who is this?

My lolo uses this sentence like a paragraph break into a looping series of statements

He consequently remarks on changes from since he last remembers me. This depends entirely on what he chooses to remember.

"Oh you've grown, you used to be so small."

"Do you box?"

"You used to be so handsome, now you look chinese."

"You're wearing a shirt that says vacancy, you must still be single."

"Are you Susan's son? Are you my grandson? Wow, you're here."

All of these in Binisaya, looping back into, "Kinsa man ni?"

To which I reply, "Si Christian po," "Christian," or "your grandson."

2. "Sumbagon ta ka!"
As far as requests go, this is always his alternative condition.

Jokingly, my mother responded by picking up a handy badminton racket and she raised it. Lolo leaned away and said "Sakit na!" "That's gonna hurt!" As he giggled a bit.

"Don't drive too fast or I'll punch you!"

"If I fall into the water, I'll punch you!"

"If that ladder falls on me, I'll punch you!"

"Scratch my BACK!!! I'll punch you!"

This is a conversation he had with the boatman helping him up to the boat:

(My grandfather can barely walk)

"Don't let me fall, or I'll punch you!"

"I won't let you fall. Besides, you won't hit. This is Pacquiao you're dealing with."

"I'll bet you 20 pesos I can hit you. And your head will fly off when I do!"


3. "Hoy! BAYOT!"
"Hey! FAGOT!"

I have nothing against gay men. I have a fair share of gay friends. That I disapprove of them, playing hide the sausage, by the back door, doesn't mean that I can't be civil and respectful toward them.

I really don't put this behavior past him. He used to swear at me when I was nine.

Lolo's pretty senile so most of his requests are pretty much insane, if not simply difficult or summarily gross. So people who take care of him, take care to ignore him a lot as well.

This is his his way of attracting attention.

4. "Pasumbag ka?"
"You wanna be punched?"

This is lolo's special way of saying thank you. You'll hear this often, while walking away after doing something for him. This usually means you weren't in enough of a hurry, doing what he wanted.

5. "Unsa man imong daa? Pagkaon man na? Saa man aho?"
"What are you carrying? Is that food? Where's mine?"

Said in rapid succession, these constitute my grandfather's special way of saying hello. It's good to see his mind is still pointing in the right direction.

He has trouble stopping, if he does get started eating. When I sneak a nibble, I have to be discreet. I've been asked to turn around and face the other way while eating on occassion. Once, I was even asked to leave the room.

6. "Take care and God bless."
This is what he said when we left. These words hold special meaning to me.

From my mother's sentiments, I feel we might not see him again. My childhood experiences of my grandfather's harsh, swearing, and striking (he literally would strike people and things) character, have since been reconciled.

I will miss him.