Na Naman

[I'm studying for my exam in CS 131 tomorrow. Here's to hoping it all turns out well]

My only real fear is monotony. It feels good to come to terms with that. I'm afraid of doing the same thing over and over again because I know how safe monotony makes me feel.

Sometimes I have dreams where all I try to do is wake up. In these dreams, I feel my head just stuck to the pillow, my breath permanently suspended. For the next minute, all I can think about is putting my finger in my throat and open my airway so I can breath and get enough energy to pull myself off of my pillow and out of sleep. I end up actually waking up, then falling asleep again, and going the same dream all over again. After these dreams, I just wake up exhausted.

I suppose that's why death seems so appealing. Seeing as I don't believe in an afterlife, death spares me, with finality, my fear of monotony.

I have to concede that COLOR IT RED put it best. It loathes me to admit this song brings me to tears:

Na Naman

Pipigilan ko ang araw sa paglubog
Dahil ayaw ko pang matulog
Dahil sa umaga paggising
Alimusal ko ay tapsilog

Na nana naman
nana naman
nana naman

Pipigilan ko ang araw sa pagsikat
Dahil sa iskol walang freecut
Dahil sa teacher kong subrang kunat
Ang grade ko ay tinarat

Na nana naman
nana naman
nana naman

Pipigilan ko ang araw sa paglubog
Dahil ayaw ko pang matulog
Dahil sa umaga paggising
Alimusal ko ay tapsilog

Na nana naman
nana naman
nana naman

Na nana naman
nana naman
nana naman